15 April 2013

Premature Ejaculation SXT 114


So last week at work, I ran into a colleague who surprised me so much I said i would share with you. She said "come o Laitan, what is the meaning of this your blog and all the rubbish sex-sex things you write about?"
 I was shocked because she isn't just any colleague, she is a gynecologist! I was in a hurry that day but I know she reads my blog so here is my reply " You read my blog because you enjoy all the rubbish sex-sex things I write about, and just in case your husband is improving in bed he might be reading Doc Laitan too!"

If you are new here, I suggest you start from SXT (sex therapy) 101 where I explained the 4 phases of sex then moved on to sexual dysfunctions at the different stages; arousal, reduced libido, Vaginismus and pain. We are at the stage of intercourse and have discussed about oral sex, today it is important we go into details about premature ejaculation since una no go allow person rest on top this matter! (Lool)

What is premature ejaculation(PE)?
This means ejaculating before you or your partner wants. It interestingly affects about 1 in every 3 men and about 40% of male population in the world. It is a frustrating disorder that can mess a guy up in front of the girl of his dreams, and when the babe sees that this guy is a one-minute-man she might take off. There are different levels of severity of PE; Mr Young (the penis) might throw up in front of Miss Caro (the vagina), just as its entering, immediately it enters, or in less than a minute of action. The most common is the short movie type (lol). Most men with PE are stressed out about it and 50% of them avoid sex of any kind for the fear of PE.

What causes premature ejaculation?
In most cases, the exact cause of premature ejaculation would not be found but the causes are physical, psychological or both.

Psychological causes
-The need to shag quickly and avoid being discovered (a.k.a Quickie)
-Feeling guilty about having sex with the partner or even having sex at all
-Anxiety about PE worsens PE
-Marital or relationship issues can affect and worsen PE
-Stress

Physical causes
-Hormone profile abnormalities
-Thyroid disorders
-Prostate disease
-Disorders of the male genital system involving the sperm ejaculatory system
-Genetics
-Some medications' side effect
-Surgical damage

Managing premature ejaculation
Couples self treatment methods
1. Use condoms and make sure they are not the "extra thin" type, try gold circle (they are not paying me o, mscheeew, lol) .
2. Use anaesthetic or numbing cream. This reduces sensation to a minimum but your partner would also lack sensation for the period of intercourse. You can put the cream inside the condom but make sure it is just a little so it doesn't trickle out of the condom.
3. Pressure techniques. Ask your partner to apply some pressure in the prostate area midway between your scrotum and your anus to stop ejaculation since the prostatic action causes release of the juice! Pulling down the scrotum (balls) can also help, the area to pull is that part close to the shaft of the penis.
4. Change your mind set about sex from a method of "coming" to a method of relaxing and being close to your partner. This reduces anxiety. Pause during sex and think about other things then continue after about 15 seconds. Be sure to carry your partner along, communication is key in treating PE.
5. Avoid active positions like missionary or doggy, change to non-active ones like spoon-on-spoon method (a.k.a side to side) and woman-on-top method (avoid oga at the top method, lol).
6. Stop and start method.  Stop just before coming by tightly pressing the neck of the penis (strangle Mr Young, lol) for about 10 seconds, then rest for another 20 seconds before resuming shagging. To master this, I usually recommend a guy practices by masturbating with cream so as not to frustrate a non cooperating partner.
7. Perineal muscles exercises. Just like the kegels for women (Vaginismus SXT 110), it is called PC (pubococcygeal) exercise for men. Act like you want to pee, then hold it. Do this each time for about 10 seconds, any time you remember. I recommend 30 times a day. Also practice it during sex to gain control over your orgasm.
8. Masturbation a few hours before sex can help reduce tension and anxiety.

When to see a Professional
If your usual intercourse lasts less than a minute and you have tried all the steps given above, then contact a sex therapist, psychologist, or psychiatrist for help. If you would like my help, send an email to doclaitan@gmail.com 
Medication would depend on outcome of some routine tests required, your age and if your state of health.


Complications of Premature Ejaculation
PE puts a considerable strain on sexual relationships, can cause depression, substance abuse especially alcohol and can lead to infertility in some cases.

If you are suffering from this frustrating sexual dysfunction, speak up and get treated! 

Have a sexy week.