26 April 2013

Dear Kamil,


I must admit that yours is indeed an experience to share so I had to jump the queue to post your dilemma, this is what I think of the situation.

There are major issues to address here and fortunately for you, yours is not a hopeless situation. Since you still have early morning erections, everything is in order. Some medications for premature
ejaculation may worsen your health because of your genotype (sickle cell) so you will need to be closely monitored. I particularly would prefer to start you on some antidepressants that also help improve erectile dysfunctions and premature ejaculation. The psychiatrist you saw a few years ago probably had that in mind too but possibly did not communicate it clearly to you or because you were depressed at the time, processing information could have been difficult.

You have to register at a good sickle cell clinic if you haven't. Sickle cell isn't a death sentence like people think, It only requires more visits to your doctor and mentally accepting that you have been created differently. Emotional and psychiatric disorders like depression can worsen the outcome of sickle cell disease, hence you need to also be registered with a psychiatrist. 

I must discourage anal sex....particularly because of your genotype. There are many risks involved and you do not want that added to your present circumstances. Whatever your sexual orientation is at the moment is your personal choice, but it is obvious you are with a man because of low confidence and possibly low self esteem. You said you are not in love with him and you are at the receiving end but he is a confidant that he cares about you, then why is he shagging you if he cares?. I have further clarifications so if you live in Lagos, get in touch to discover your true sexuality.

Alcohol addiction is a huge problem with adverse consequences on your health. Please bro, that has to stop. You may require rehabilitation. A urologist can help with the erectile dysfunction if you want. Psychiatrists also help people with erectile dysfunctions.

An important sex therapy tip for you is to try masturbating and see what happens. Get your partner to help If there is some sexual attraction, if there isn't then try erotic books and movies. Time your erection and see if you ejaculate. Then your sex therapist would take it from there, wait a minute....I am the only professional sex therapist I know! *wink!

Goodluck Kamil


All experiences and dilemmas shared have been edited, with names and events changed for confidentiality. To share, send an email to doclaitan@gmail.com